It's Miller Time! (Pass the Bacos)

Continuing my long-running, hard-hitting series on Friday food posts, let me inform you of some breaking news.  It has now been adjudicated that Miller Genuine Draft is actually...beer.  That's right, the men in robes have conclusively ruled that, despite its taste and appearance as a yellowish watery substance, MGD is, in fact, beer.  So, as you stock up for the weekend ahead, go on, buy yourself that six pack you were worried was not really beer.  Special thanks to the always-brilliant Taranto for this find.

Ah, but what to eat with that beer?  Well, if you're like most Americans, whatever you choose as your dish, you'll put meat on top!  That's right, according to "The Onion" (a satire site, with a fair share of offensive content, be forewarned!), a new report shows that meat is the number two condiment in America:

Though once defined as just a stand-alone meal, meat has risen quickly up the ranks to become the nation's second most popular condiment, according to a study released by the U.S. Department of Agriculture...

"In the past several years, meat's use as a way to enhance the flavor of foods has increased exponentially," said Agriculture Secretary Mike Johanns. "Ketchup is still number one, but at the rate people are putting meat on top of other meats and foods, it may very well surpass it by 2010."

You can read the rest of the report here.

Have a nice weekend once that 5 o'clock whistle blows everyone!

Blogs great, content's less filling,

Thomas More

allthesemore@yahoo.com

Comments

[John]

I for one don't buy it (literally or figuratively). I know it looks like beer, but that's pretty much where the resemblance ends. IMHO.

[Philomena]

"Yellowish watery substance" indeed. I admire your literary restraint, Thomas. The rest of us have a more consise description:)

[Thomas More]

John,

Fair enough, you disagree with the judges--many people can understand that.

But might I suggest two important words?

Sam Adams

Or how about another two?

Brewer Patriot.

Now, I'm told by a friend in the Queen City, home of Sam Adams, that Sam Adams is not really Sam Adams!

That's right, when they sat down to print up the labels, it turned out that Sam wasn't much of a looker. Paul Revere, however, was perfect. So, the story goes, that is actually Paul Revere's image on Sam Adams bottles/advertising, not Sam himself!

How perfectly American for a perfect American beer: the real person isn't pretty enough for the marketing department, so we'll put aside history and go with what sells!! (Beer commercials are notorious for using good looks to sell product--I guess this even applies to 18th Century heroes.)

If anyone could confirm or refute this Revere/Adams switch story, I'd appreciate it.

Thomas More

P.S. Philomena, restraint is one of my strong suits.

[Timothy]

Here is the pictoral defense of the Adams/Revere argument:
Paul Revere's portrait by John Singleton Copley is here: artchive.com/artchive/C/copley/revere.jpg.html. A real portrait of Samuel Adams is here: nndb.com/people/732/000048588/. And the beer bottle is here: gobostoncard.com/attractions/ Samuel-Adams-Brewery.html.

The rebuttal is as follows:
Many people claim that the man on the label of Samuel Adams and other Boston Beer Company brands is not Samuel Adams, but Paul Revere. However, during tours of the brewery, tour guides explain that the portrait of Samuel Adams that they use on the label is based on a statue of an older Adams, and that they simply regressed his age, which led to the confusion.

I leave you to your own conclusions.

As for the MGD discussion...While I am not a fan, I do wish to defend and profess allegience to the Miller Brewing Company. As a former beer snob (Tucher still being my beer of choice) I would never have been caught dead with a domestic in my hand until that fateful day when a friend introduced me the the self-proclaimed "Champagne of Beers", Miller High Life.

You won't find any fancy marketing or models here. There are only overweight, greasy, car fixin', lawnmowin', fried food eatin' men in their comercials. The sell it as a man's beer and at $6.49 a 12-pack I have a hard time buying anything else. Even my wife, who is a strict Guiness and Newcastle drinker, partakes every now and again. All that to say, don't throw the baby out with the bath water-Miller may still have something to offer the world. If you have never experienced the High Life, I suggest you check it out as it just might change your life.

Cheers,

Timothy

[nicodemus]

I admire John and Philomena's sentiment: to call Miller Genuine Draft beer is genuinely daft. It also brings to mind Chesterton's opening stanza to "The Song of Right and Wrong" Here goes:

Feast on wine or fast on water
And your honour shall stand sure,
God's Almighty son and daughter
He the valiant, she the pure;
If an angel out of heaven
Brings you other things to drink,
Thank him for his kind attentions,
Go and pour them down the sink.

[Thomas More]

GK must have been unacquainted with Scotch.

[nicodemus]

Impossible. Only that an Englishman can't very well go praising the virtues of his northern neighbors. I wish I could find the essay where Chesterton approvingly quotes the old pub song "Beer, beer, glorious beer, fill your mugs right up to here...." *Could* one sing that with MGD in hand? What are Bacos?

[Thomas More]

The are bacon "spinkles" that come in a plastic container. You shake them on top of salads, etc. as a condiment to give your dish a little extra crunch. (essentially, meat as a condiment.)