Struggling

I've been struggling.  You see, my children won't obey.  They whine and talk back and give me attitude, and I'm getting worn out.  The fact that I'm homeschooling means that I get a full dose of this nearly every day all day long.  You would think the fact that I'm with them all the time would mean that I would have trained them NOT to do such things.  But alas, they have not "arrived" yet, so to speak.  (In their defense, they don't disobey ALL the time.  But sometimes it seems quite frequent! :)

I have spent many hours reading parenting books, coming up with my disciplinary strategies, etc.  I have spent many hours praying and asking God to give me patience, wisdom and clarity as to how I should parent them.  But the most convicting thing I've read lately was in I Samuel 3:13 when God says that He is ready to punish Eli, the priest, because, "I have warned him continually that judgment is coming for his family, because his sons are blaspheming God and he hasn't disciplined them."  Eli and his sons would die soon after.

My children aren't blaspheming God, but I still have a responsibility to discipline them.  Their behavior is my responsibility, especially while they are young.  One day it will be theirs alone, but hopefully by then, they will have learned how to submit to the Lord and obey Him directly, after learning to obey their Mom and Dad in their youth.

Working every day to do better (by God's Spirit),

Lucy 

Comments

[beth]

Dear Lucy,

My friend with five children said her kids went through times when they tested boundaries - it even seemed to hit at regular intervals - 2/5/8, or so. It seemed to correlate to them getting smarter - they could do more, think better. "Are the boundaries Mom set a while back still there?" Bang, bang, bang, against those boundary walls, just checking to see if they were still where they were put last time.

It is indeed hard going, and it's 'pay now or pay later'. But once the boundaries are clearly defined again - and some kids have to bang against every square inch of the boundary wall! - they settle down for a while.

Bon courage!

Your comrade in arms,
Beth

[Lucy]

Thank you, dear Beth. That is encouraging.

I just spoke tonight with a friend whose 7-year-old son has been testing her limits and pushing her buttons! We discussed the practice of laying hands on our children while they're sleeping and praying over them. I have heard others say that praying over their children in the night has resulted in some miraculous changes in their attitude and behavior. I also know that praying over my kids reminds me that it is GOD who works in them to conform them into His image. Too often, I try and try to "conform" them myself, only to discover... I can't! Alas, I can nothing with Him.

Finally, I'm learning that God needs to change MY attitude as well. How humbling! I forgot how parenting refines us parents as well as our kids. Thanks be to God.
-Lu